Chef’s Log 15: I Dream Of Pepperoni


So Good

As I have mentioned earlier, I have come to greatly admire the style of cooking known as ‘Italian’. And recently, I came across some of the best samples yet (considering how much I have been consuming, this is saying a lot). It has been a while since I have encountered a dish that has intrigued, baffled and enchanted me all at the same time. But we’ll get to that. First, I want to speak of the pizza. Pizza, I have discovered, is a very strange dish; strange because its value seems to differ greatly from place to place. From what I have learnt, the western area of the planet largely considers it ordinary, everyday food that is reasonably priced. However, on this side of Earth, it is an expensive indulgence- its price suggests that it is nothing less than a gourmet meal. Very puzzling, I say. Nevertheless, the pizza I discovered at ‘Pesto Pesto’ is the finest that I have ever sampled. The crust was thin and crunchy, imbued with the delectable smokiness that comes from being cooked in a wood oven. And the pepperoni- I cannot even conceive of describing the pepperoni. Mere words would fail in capturing the sheer glory, the utter perfection, the rapturous joy encapsulated in those thin little slices of delicious, delicious meat. Who knew that such a tiny piece of protein could contain such an intensely powerful flavour? Every bite packed a punch. In fact, I’m not even sure that something so tasty should be legal- it would have been banned on Gastronomica. Of course, to be fair, food is taken a tad more seriously there; it is, after all, the currency. Pesto Pesto’s basil and honey iced tea was the perfect accompaniment to the pizza. And just when I thought that the pizza had permanently ruined all food for me by setting such a high standard, I tried the dessert called ‘Panacotta’- truly an astounding dish. The texture was smoother, silkier and softer than any I have happened upon (at least on Earth) and the sweet caramel on top added a delightful crunch. It was

If I had tear ducts, this would make me cry

If I had tear ducts, this would make me cry

creamy, but not at all milky, sweet but not overpoweringly so, and had a consistency so perfect that I wondered if maybe this was another one of the humans’ strange technological deceptions like that ‘3D’ that they’re so proud of. Every spoonful literally melted in my mouth. Surely ‘panacotta’ must translate to ‘heaven’ in the native language. Overall, this meal was an experience which truly elevated my taste buds. All humans who wish for an exceptional feast must visit this place.

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