Chef’s Log 61: The Door to Deliciousness

Apologies for the long absence. You see, I was on holiday visiting family in another solar system. And as you might have guessed, a mere month on Earth is a very long time anywhere else. Really, I don’t know how Earthlings have not figured out how to manipulate the universal space-time continuum yet. It’s so primitive. Continue reading

Chef’s Log 60: It’s Getting Draughty

I confess, it took me a while to wrap my head around this thing called ‘beer.’ It confused me. It was fizzy, and most fizzy drinks I had sampled till then were sweet; overwhelmingly so. But not only is beer not sweet, it’s downright bitter! Add to that a strange frothiness, and I was flabbergasted. Continue reading

Chef’s Log 59: A Prem-ium Meal

On my planet, once a restaurant reaches a certain age (the Earth equivalent of around 2,000 years) it is declared a place of worship–a place where one can go to reflect upon the divine nature of food. Patrons are required to treat the meal that is served with the utmost reverence. It becomes a place of solace and tranquility. Continue reading

Chef’s Log 57: Canapé Your Respect

‘Value for money’ is a term used very loosely on this planet. Money itself is a strange concept. I don’t understand why humans didn’t stick to the original barter system. My planet has been using it for the past hundred millennia or so and it still works perfectly fine. It is yet more evidence of the species’ declining intelligence, if you ask me. Continue reading

Chef’s Log 56: The Route to Happiness

The burger is a beautiful and complex thing. Never before have I encountered a single dish that can be so many different things and serve so many different purposes all at once: it satisfies a meat craving as well as any steak does, it’s the ultimate sandwich (if you stretch the definition of sandwich a bit), it’s a balanced meal (at least my version of a balanced meal) with various elements, it’s fast food. What’s truly fascinating is that a meal which was born out of necessity and poverty has evolved over time to become something truly iconic and even indulgent. But this post is not about the history of the burger. It is about the best (and by the best, I mean the BEST) burger that I have ever tasted. Continue reading

Chef’s Log 55: Konkan Impressed

Humans are such strange creatures. They pierce themselves and make lasting holes in their bodies. They create permanent wounds using ink. And they have the gall to call it ‘art’! Luckily, these puzzling tendencies do not reflect on their food. If this ever-perplexing race has anything that represents a saving grace, it is what they eat. A good example of this is the restaurant ‘Konkan Express.’ First and foremost, it is exactly what the name promises. The food is authentic; the service, quick. I tried the Bhangda Fry and the Mutton Kolhapuri with Jawar Bhakari. The fish was fresh, beautifully seasoned, and crisped to perfection. Continue reading